Top 10 products to avoid eternal damnation. Hurry buy now. Or face Gods eternal wrath.
Religion as a commodity: In the wake of chaotic consumer driven frenzy, consumers are being driven to seek refuge in religious paraphernalia. Religious artifacts provide a nostalgic sensation of the ideal imaginary past where life was much simpler and meanngful. I guess it’s a bad mix of consumerism and capitalism to BUY our happiness. Or to keep buying to be happy?
(Dalrymple, 2001)
The Eleventh Commandment: Thou shalt stop buying in the name of thy God.
1.0 Grow a Buddha
Official description:
"Growing your Buddha is the first step on your path to Enlightenment!" o yeah absolutely, considering it’s a slang for marijuana. Rub the Buddha Belly for good luck!"
2.0 Jesus 3D Glasses:
For those lost souls who don’t realize yet the world we see is already 3d.
For those lost souls who don’t realize yet the world we see is already 3d.
Jesus Glasses that may or may not make a difference.
3.0 Wash away your sins with Jesus Soap Bar – blueq.com
4.0 To fight the unholy E-heathens and guide the lost E-Souls comes the BibleMan. Spreading the world of God in the virtual world, BibleMans will soon present GTR; Grand Theft Restoration.
5.0 Baby Jesus Butt Plug!?!
What can I say? The divine can buy it here.
Selling God?
NO. It ain’t new. What was the first thing every to be marketed? God. But I guess the question should be does the god really need marketing?
God is the oldest marketed phenomenon and has been on the market ever since. From Feng Shui to Christmas cards, from a rosary to religious pilgrims, from Jesus Camps to Jesus Jeans, from evangelical TV listings to Christian rock, religion is big business.
Is this just an innocent propagation of religion in 21st century with contemporary tools as marketing and advertising or is this just a niche for those who have nothing to do with faith? Neoliberalism perhaps. (Barker)
Like any product god, religion and spirituality have been tamed over the years to make it more appealing to masses. Hey after all, a good product needs to constantly change to adjust to its external Environment. Hence very carefully religion has been moderated to become more attractive.
For instance Jesus has been transformed to a more lovable blonde haired, blue eyed hunk. Now who can dislike that? I wonder if all Palestinians look so elegant and picture perfect.
There seems to be no shame in the game of corporate religion. With the dawn of 21st century the silent takeover of a materialistic and tangible god has escalated online. In 2001 Adam Burtle sold his soul on ebay, which was suspended but not before a bid
of $400 was reached. The advert read:
"Please realize, I make no warranties as to the condition of the soul.
As of now, it is near mint condition, with only minor scratches”
In 2002 Nathan Wright did the same thing, selling his religious soul in a jar for $31 plus $15 postage and handling. Nathan wrote the jar ‘may or may not’ have contained fudge in it at some time.
A popular sales group for propagating the so called word of god is the televangelist. Televangelist have turned the talk of god into a daily soap opera, both on and off-screen. This has to be the most controversial group in America today with numerous televangelists being involved in sex scandals with prostitutes and even gay men. Many have bought private aircrafts and probably expensed by the donations from the shows. There are at least 30 ministries with multiple LUXURY jets that cost tens of millions of donated dollars in US today. (Rusty Leonard) The most unattractive. clichéd, unintelligent and full of thyself morons with intellectual level of a primitive Arab camel. One look at this daft telecast reminds me of saying of Karl Marx “opium of the masses”.
Thou shalt not doubt the power bestowed in the televengalist.
Jesus Coat
Organized religious institutions also have salespeople namely pastors, priest, Imams, televangelist and Rabbis – Selling their respective religions. These salesmen look great, dress smart, very approachable and have a smiling face. In this chaotic fast moving world, they aim to build relationships so people can trust them for customer loyalty and repeat business. They are often very good listeners, and manage to relate to everyone’s misery in life.
In an era where even wars are being sold by P.R companies, a new niche has evolved over the years. Dedicated businesses that help ministries and churches setup a business model and market their religion. Churches deciding to entrap itself in this web have no option but to profit in disguise to pay for the services appointed. and targeting the lame sanctimonious fools makes sense to provide more buck for the bang by providing religious products.
Talking about religion and greed, how can I not talk about Scientology? It’s like talking about Lindsay and not mentioning cocaine. Scientologists have laced money grabbing tactics and religion to a whole new level. The more Ka-Chig you give, the more pious you are. In fact some religious scriptures are only available to pious millionaires. In fact only a handful of people can actually afford the high cost of scientology, and poor members needs to accumulate enough dough to for their love and mercy of the All Powerful, All Greedy.
